The Bishops’ Decision: My reflection on General Synod and participating in Shared Conversations

by David Bennett

With thanksgiving and praise to our Heavenly Father and glory to the Lord Jesus Christ, I am truly overcome with joy by the Bishops’ decision today to retain the Church’s teaching on the sacrament of marriage as being between a man and a woman: the very image of God expressed in sexual union between two partners who are both distinct and like one another, body, soul and spirit, like God is distinct within himself and yet one essence, Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

I have felt to join my voice with the Bishops decision today, I have decided to write a short reflection on my experience speaking as one of the four panel members at the General Synod to share their experience of being gay and Christian. This was a significant moment in history and I hope it blesses you:

As I arrived in York, my heart was thumping. Entering the University of York campus, I prayed in the Holy Spirit, asking God to speak His words through me. Pulling up near the meeting hall, I was reminded of a Christian mission I had led years before and seen many people come to know the Lord Jesus as their personal Lord and saviour. The joy of knowing Jesus Christ was the real reason I was coming to share at the General Synod of the Church of England. I knew God had called me to make history that day and had appointed me for such a time as this.

As a member of the Living Out team, I was invited personally by the Archbishop along with three other panel members of a similar age who all had seven minutes to share their stories in front of 500+ major leaders, arch/bishops, rectors, lay people. For me, the decision over same-sex marriages in the church wasn’t just a matter of personal significance, this was a prophetic call and one that had cost me personally so much, but also brought me profound joy. I had come with a message from the Lord to be heard through my story and testimony. As we were ushered on to the stage, the sea of faces blurred. These were only one tiny portion of the huge cloud of witnesses who had given their lives to Christ that were in my mind. As others shared their stories, I felt the Holy Spirit come on me and God say “I am proud of you, David, my beloved son… I have called you to speak my Word to my people. Do not fear man, fear me alone. Thank you for being hot, and not lukewarm.”

As I got up and shared my personal testimony, the message that rushed through my veins like a fire that could not be contained. Jesus Christ is the Lord of His Church. What the world says, what we say, does not matter at the end of the day. What truly matters is what He says and His will and desires are. Tears poured down from my eyes as I spoke. As I looked across the audience I saw my family of my brothers and sisters peering at me; many who I knew had sinned awfully against me – deleted me off Facebook, sent horrible private messages to me, but many who I knew had loved me so deeply and given their blood sweat and tears to love me. I was filled with the deepest weightiness as I went to open my mouth. A pin-drop suspense and silence hushed the place.  This wasn’t just about sexuality or my life on Earth, this was about a Heavenly battle taking place in a realm beyond this one, and I knew somehow, I was in the Lord’s army. Here is an excerpt from what I said:

Today I stand in front of you representing 1000s of people like myself who aren’t making a fuss about their sexuality – who are living costly lives of discipleship with their same-sex attractions. I want to implore you today in the sight of Jesus Christ to consider that blessing same-sex relationships will have very negative consequences on people like myself.  

Such a decision not only denies the clear teaching of scripture and the tradition of the Church for thousands of years but it denies the truth of Jesus’ voice in our lives and impairs the vital marker of true evangelism: holiness. If the Church blesses same-sex couples that sends a clear message that holy celibacy as a response to grace and the teaching of scripture is pointless. It says that we are simply wasting our sacrificial celibacy and costly discipleship like the woman who poured the alabaster jar on Jesus’ feet.

People say our time could have been spent on a relationship and yet by saying that romantic love is necessary for the greatest human flourishing, they deny the full humanity of Christ who was himself celibate and our example. Our voices will be lost in the loud noise of activism and agenda. I know all around the world those who are, in great sacrifice to ourselves obeying God. Whilst the intention may not be to delete us, you will inevitably do so. Whilst I do not deny the horrific pain that we LGBTQI people go through, I implore you today before the judgment seat of God to listen to Jesus Christ. His view is what matters, not the loud plurality that are demanding your full and disingenuous affirmation. Be the Church, and do not conform to the pattern of this world.

I feel quite emotionally impacted and moved by this very courageous decision. It has truly been an honour to participate in the Shared Conversations, share my story and to see this result. It has been a personal sacrifice to so openly share, but I did it to glorify the Lord and to benefit those who do not have a voice. I am so very proud of Justin Welby and Church of England and the Bishops who are standing on the Word of God, in the love of God, openly accepting all gay people, but retaining the truth of God’s Image in humanity sexually: male and female in the covenant and sacrament of marriage (not modern romanticism’s de facto marriage which does not involve God). Please pray for them as they will inevitably receive vitriol and violent slander from the world.

Praise God for this. I am all for people defining marriage outside of the church as they see fit, but the Church is the Lord Jesus Christ’s and His alone. His Word and Voice are final, not just our experience. This is an act of solidarity with SSA/Gay people who are celibate and faithful to original call in Christ to be “washed and waiting,” giving their whole selves to Christ’s Lordship. We are a minority within a minority and desperately need real support and care in the Church.

Jesus Christ wants, as it says in Ephesians, “to sanctify her (the bride of Christ the Church), cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to Himself as a glorious church, without stain or wrinkle or any such blemish, but holy and blameless.” Holiness, obedience, self-surrendering love is his desire. We love you, Lord Jesus and any response less than offering your body up as a living sacrifice is not worthy of your cross, your self-sacrifice on our behalf. You alone are worthy of all of me. Today’s decision glorifies the Lord Jesus Christ. There is no greater knowledge in my life than that.